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I Need to Talk
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Thread Starter: lost.without.brandon
Started: 09-15-2009 10:13 PM
Replies: 0
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 15 Sep 2009, 10:13 PM
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i have really been dealing with alot lately. i am a senior in high school and i lost my brother at the beginning of my 6th grade year. i have never had professional help or anything but a times i really think i need it. there were many times in middle school that i talked to teachers and administration, and they helped me as much as they could. and in high school i have kind of kept quite, except for a few spills. 1 of the 2 people i talked to last year alot, i talk to this year again. i told her something that i kept from her last school year. i burn myself with the tip of a hot lighter to release pain. i did it several times through the spring and managed to quit on my own and not tell a soul. then as i am getting stressed out this fall, i have wanted to do it many times. i told the teacher that i trust with so much, and she asked me to go see the new school guidance counselor. i was tricked and forced into it eventually. but i am really glad that she did what she did. but i have been talking to our counselor and gotten really confortable talking to her which is unusual for me to accept someone new. we have gone over the burning, and i dont sleep at night. i was sleeping like 3-4 hours a night. but the problem is she wants me to see someone that comes into our school that could give me more help than her. i dont want to go open up to someone new again. it was hard enough the way it was. something i did not tell the guidance counselor was that i got so worried about having to talk to this new lady, and the stress of homework and appling to colleges, and softball, and missing my brother, and problems at home, i ended up burning myself again last week. i know it is one of the most stupid things ever, and it fixes nothing, but i really dont know what to do. it freaks me out to talk, i am a writter. im supposed to go talk to this new lady tomorrow, and im scared shitless..i wanna go do stupid *** which i know i shouldnt!
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