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Missing my Sister

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Forum: Loss of a Sibling
Thread Starter: myachyheart
Started: 05-09-2008 8:28 PM
Replies: 25

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 myachyheart
 
  09 May 2008, 8:28 PM
Missing my Sister
Hello,

My sister killed herself, and it still hurts our family. My momma is taking it the worst. Our daddy is a minister, and tries to comfort us, and encourages us all to be strong. I have 5 children of my own, and my momma Bless her heart sits and cries all the time.

I love her so, and share her tears, and her pain. My sister was and will always be my very best friend. I tell my momma that, and I'm very close to her as well.

Thank you for reading, and Happy Mother's Day to all Mother's out there, and may the Lord be with you all.

Warmly,
Quinn
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 delores
 
  12 May 2008, 2:00 PM
Re: Missing my Sister
Quinn....so sorry about the loss of your sister.  I can not tell you that I have experienced this, but daughter lost her half brother last August, due to a motocycle accident.    She was also very close to him  According to her Grief counselor.  She writes letters to Bret.  This seems to help her alot.  Just to talk to him.  Also she just got her memorial tattoo for her brother.  Yes Quinn....she does get mad at him for not listening to people about going on thus advanced ride, because he was a beginner.  All sorts of emotions flood you.  For you mother just stay close and keep your sisters memory alive.  We do for Bret.  I wish there was more for me to say to you to help, but words....well sometimes they are just words.  Look for little signs from her.  I know Bret leaves them for Ashley.  God Bless Quinn and you family.
 
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 myachyheart
 
  13 May 2008, 5:44 AM
Re: Missing my Sister

Thank you Delores, I try everything. My siblings try too. My Daddy is a minister and helps heal all of us but she is so weak & has given up on life. Mother's Day was a nightmare for all of us.

The only one who seems to calm momma down is uncle Tommy. He is so soothing, relaxing and she listens to him. I tell her everyday I love her and hug her. She goes to the cemetary practically everyday to see my sister. Thank you for your words and for carinf Delores. May the Lord be with you.

Warmly,

Quinn


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 Hero in heaven
 http://russell-hilinski-jr.memory-of.com
  15 May 2008, 9:38 AM
Re: Missing my Sister
I am so sorry for the loss of your sister. I also lost my brother Russell last Aug to a motorcycle accident. we was very close and still today it is very hard to deal with it. My mom was just like yours and kinda still is we keep her busy and keep family events going all the time. my mom is always pulling out my brothers childhood pictures or his school work or going to his grave site and even emeorial site weekly. she has to learn to deal with it on hher own time you can't force her or even try to feel her pain. I allow my mom to cry, scream or whatever she needs to do to feel better. we are coming up my my brothers 1 yr and my grams they was 3 weeks apart from one another in their passing so it is hard on all of us. I went an got a memorial tattoo also for my brother and everytime i look at it i feel good. I love planting at his sites for him everything i do helps me not forget the pain but lesson it some it makes me feel like i am still doing stuff for him. I hope in time your mom will open up more to you and talk she seems like she is holding alot in and that isn't good especially on you guys.
 
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 myachyheart
 
  15 May 2008, 4:29 PM
Re: Missing my Sister

Hello,

Thank you hero in heaven (I apologize I don't know your name). My condolences for your loss. It is so painful and it feels like we are all alone? My Momma cries all the time and I allow her to on my shoulder, Daddy being a minister is helpful to me in some healing. I try to come here and vent and hope I can try to help anyother human being that has lost anyone. That pain is so bad. She talks about my sister alot and Daddy well, he is 67 and in his own little world.

Thank you for replying to me, may the Lord Bless you dear Brother now and always.

Blessings,

Quinn


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 Hero in heaven
 http://russell-hilinski-jr.memory-of.com
  15 May 2008, 8:57 PM
Re: Missing my Sister

Quinn,

I am sorry my name is Holly. it will take your mom some time time parts are 59 and 73 and it hit very hard with both of them. I honestly didn't care to go to church as i blamed him for taking my brother that night he didn't deserve to die like that and i guess he was the first i blamed. All you can do is listen to her stories of your sister and laugh with her or cry with her. it helps my mom having me there to laugh and my new baby girl was such a blessing as she keeps my mom always laughing,but she says often oh how your brother would of loved seeing her grow up. i am always here if you need to talk your self or we can same emails if you'd want to talk that way.

 

God bless you Quinn and your wonderful family

Holly


 
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 myachyheart
 
  15 May 2008, 9:34 PM
Re: Missing my Sister

Holly,

Thank you for your thoughtful words, and kind advice. It is how I feel inside. My Daddy doesn't get it, and my poor Momma suffering everyday since Julie's death. It is so hard right now. My kids miss her too and my husband was best friends with him.

Nothing makes Momma laugh anymore, she talks of staying in the cemetary like a mad woman. I cry Holly so much that my Momma will be ok, I really fear for her. I thank you for listening, for reading and caring. Many don't around here I can tell. But you are so kind. There are others that are so wise and have given me some good advice and thank them so much!!!

God Bless you, & be with You always Holly

Blessings,

Quinn


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 Hero in heaven
 http://russell-hilinski-jr.memory-of.com
  16 May 2008, 2:39 PM
Re: Missing my Sister

Quinn,

I also hurt and get angry alot and usually have to keep it to myself. I don't want to hurt my mom or kids with them seeing me upset so i just kinda deal with it alone. it is hard and i never know what to say to my kids when they question things about my brother. our mom's i don't think will ever be the same. how old was your sister? my brother died at 31 and it was a horrible motorcycle accident we thank god every day he died on impact and didn't suffer or at least we are trying to believe the officers said he was dead when they got to him. so many questions go unanswered and it is very hard. i am always around if you ever need a friend i am here.

 

God bless

Holly


 
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 myachyheart
 
  17 May 2008, 2:37 PM
Re: Missing my Sister

Hello Holly,

Praise the Lord a human being for writing back and who truly cares. My momma today told me she wants to just sit in the cemetary all day and all night! I think she is losing it. My children are falling apart because they see momma so distraught. Uncle Tommy is the rock of the family but no one knows what to do for her. I try so hard, I sit with her and talk and cry with her. I can't even type this without falling apart, I'm sorry Holly I will write later on, I just wanted to thank you for your reply. I'm here for you as well.

Blessings,
Quinn


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 Hero in heaven
 http://russell-hilinski-jr.memory-of.com
  22 May 2008, 7:35 AM
Re: Missing my Sister

Quinn,

wanted to touch base and see how you and your mom was doing? I haven't been on recently as the last few weeks we have been doing alot getting ready for the program core did to honor the organ donors last sunday and it was rough,but truly special. remember i am always here if you need somene to talk to.

 

God Bless

Holly


 
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 myachyheart
 
  22 May 2008, 7:49 AM
Re: Missing my Sister

thank you Holly, momma was just taken to the hospital. I will write to you latr

Blessings,

Quinn


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 Hero in heaven
 http://russell-hilinski-jr.memory-of.com
  24 May 2008, 6:17 AM
Re: Missing my Sister

Quinn,

I hope everything is ok with your mom. I'll keep your family in my thoughts and prayers. let me know how she is doing.

 

God Bless

Holly


 
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 myachyheart
 
  29 May 2008, 5:10 AM
Re: Missing my Sister

Hello Holly:

I apologize for not writing back to you. In the other room there is a posting about me, and all the negative mean things I have written and hurt people ....... when I simply gave my opinion as all.

Hope you are doing alright. Momma is home from the hospital but is on alot of pills and will bee a counselor too. Thank you for thinking of me, as I hope you are doing alright. May the Lord be with you.

Blessings,

Quinn


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 Hero in heaven
 http://russell-hilinski-jr.memory-of.com
  02 Jun 2008, 7:54 AM
Re: Missing my Sister

Quinn,

I am so glad you mom is home an doing better. counseling might be the best thing for her right know. it is going to take some time for her it is never easy on any of us to lose someone so close to us it is still a struggle for me everyday. Don't alow others to get you down and no we are not always going to agree with someone or someone might not like what we say but to bad this is a forum and if no one likes replies they shouldn't post on a public site where all can see an reply.

 

 

Holly


 
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 myachyheart
 
  02 Jun 2008, 9:25 AM
Re: Missing my Sister

Thank you Holly for your support. Momma will be getting counseling, and I will go with her and my siblings too, since it is affecting all of us. I know you are right with everything you say above there, but you and a few have been very kind to me. I thank you and those that have given me the support. I just feel that some write to write and then others to start "rubbish" (using a word that Candy wrote me) thanks Candy, hipe you don't mind me writing that. So for me I have my Lord, my Savior and my faith that will prevail and pull me through my problens without "rubbish".

How are you doing besides that Holly? I hope and pray to the Lord that you are okay. Thank you for being there. May the Lord be with you always!!

Blessings,
Quinn


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